Oxygen

Going into the reunion felt like stepping into a KY jelly fight. You knew things were going to get slippery and someone's boob was probably going to fall out, but that it would be seriously entertaining. There was so much unfinished business with everyone. Watching the episodes had awakened new dramas and reopened old wounds. I was excited about the reunion because I knew I was a lot healthier and happier, but I was also nervous because the last time I had seen everyone, besides Cordelia, it had been nothing but drama.

Cordelia and I had made up, but that earned me a new enemy in Darlen. However I knew she was just being her usual irrational bipolar self. When I actually saw her at the hotel she started freaking out like a moron and it was kind of funny. I didn't know I had the power to piss someone off so much. Way to go me. When I started laughing at her she got even angrier. That just made me laugh more. On the morning of the reunion I was leaving and Darlen started to make snide remarks in the lobby. I don't really remember what she was saying but I told her to shut the f up and as I was walking out the door she ran up behind me like a little rat and tried to hit me or flick me on the chin. Cordelia called it a love tap. More like an irritating fly. I really wish she would have punched me so I could have sued the silicone off of her. But I guess she didn't have enough booze in her since it was only 8 am. And we both had makeup on so it was probably not a good idea. At least neither of us had to redo our hair.

We had to wait around a really long time before the show started tapping. It was so boring. Cordelia and I would sneak shots but I never got wasted to the point of no return. The directors thought it would be fun to put me in a room next to the remaining 5 girls. Lyric and Jenn had their own room. I guess no one can play nicely together. I kept hearing Darlen's annoying voice telling everyone she was going to jump on me and beat me up on stage. Right. It was so stupid. She would make her mouthy comments and there would be silence. Everyone was just ignoring her. She would say it every 5 minutes, "And then I'm going to start hitting her...blah blah blah I'm on drugs...blah blah blah." No one would say anything because no one understood where it was even coming from. Everyone knew she was being completely irrational. I think the main focus on people's minds was what was going to happen between Jenn and Cordelia. I mean, I am not Jenn's biggest fan, but I could see why she was mad. If I had been posted around Hollywood as a lost dog by my former friend I wouldn't have been too happy. But Cordelia had felt betrayed by Jenn and her fliers didn't really hurt Jenn physically. Yeah it was mean, but everyone in that house had wronged everyone at one point or another.

I feel like some of these women will just never be at peace with themselves or each other. It just goes to show, you’re never going to get along with everyone you meet. Fortunately the people I dislike I will never have to see again. Friendship wasn't in the cards for some of us. I had a lot of fun that weekend in LA.

Star Jones was a great person. She really cared about each of us and the show. She was probably one of the most sincere celebrities I have ever met. The best part really was seeing the old crew and directors. I wish our producer Laura had been there. She was such an amazing and supportive person. She saw us all through our worst and was there for us during the hard times and great times. I owe everything I learned from the experience to her. Like I've said before, I don't hate anyone I lived with and I am glad I went through everything. It made me stronger and today I am happier than I have been in years.